It doesn’t suck to be me, just now. Right now. Here and now.
Speaking as a slight agoraphobic, I’m used to living like this, very solitary, and it’s not driving me crazy, at least not yet. I’m even used to rationing toilet paper. I feel good about being at home. Keep remembering that I don’t have to hurry anything. Nothing depends on me arriving on time anywhere. Shit, I kinda like this...
I’m scared, of course. Of the virus, yes, but even staying at home still feels like a threat to me, given that the landlord wants me out of this space. Of course, my rent is taken care of thanks to Social Security and my grant from the Q Foundation, (but my fingers are always crossed). The landlord’s worries about getting the rent from his younger, working tenants might well be more acute. He certainly would have problems running around doing the paperwork for an eviction right now, plus the potential blowback... I think it sucks to be him right now.
But I’m still afraid.
Not so much of the virus, per se... Of a breakdown in civilization when this goes on too long... or of the DOJ declaring martial law and assuming authoritarian powers.
Found an N95 mask which I’ve had for years and used during recent firestorms. Old, but better than nothing. I also located a roll of toilet paper at a Mom & Pop store on Divisadero. Great fat single roll with two rolls worth of paper = $1.29, which actually doesn’t seem like scalping to me. Especially from a corner store on Divisadero...
Went to the Dispensary, and my bus karma was flawless. Bus in sight, both ways, as I walk up to the stop. On a Sunday. During a pandemic. Thanked the driver on the return trip for driving during the outbreak. Told him to stay safe.
This is going to be my mantra for the duration.
Everyone I see on the street is either walking a dog or moving towards the grocery. A few Starbucks fans - guess they’re handing the coffee through the door, one customer at a time... Bob’s Donuts, if they are open at all, will be doing the same. By and large, everybody seems to be staying inside, but for necessaries and occasionally, one by one, just getting out for air. A very few people seem to be ignoring the proximity issues.
People on the Street:
The Smoking Man. Six or seven times per day he’s standing on the corner, older Asian man, dressed in black, smoking a cigarette, knit cap peaked upon his head. Sometimes he consults his phone, much of the time he just stands there, walks down the block and back. Smoking his cigarette. He looks kind of forlorn, but I don’t know that he is.
He’s the grandpa, I think, in a large brood living Chinese style (three generations under one roof), although the young husband is Caucasian. Husband and wife have a couple of young kids, grandma takes them for walks with the stroller. Grandpa gets kicked out of the house when he wants to smoke a cigarette.
Margaret. Woman reminds me of Margaret Rutherford in her brisk and spirited demeanor. Short, somewhat stocky, she marches in a fast and deliberate, hopping kind of walk that is hard to describe. She walks stooped over, which made me think she was older at first, but sometimes she dresses distinctly goth. The other day I caught her taking a hit from a vaporizer. I always see her apparently trudging to the bus - never see her returning. Don’t believe she’s staying home from work. Perhaps she’s an essential worker...
